Problems To Come When Dating a Filipina

Updated: Mar 25, 2019

So you have started dating a wonderful girl and you will live happily ever after without a care in the world?


I regret to inform you that you cannot simply meet a nice girl on the other side of the world with a completely different culture and realistically expect to not have some problems. There will be issues as there is in any relationship, but a lot of these can be avoided by recognizing the problems when they arise, and understanding the culture behind it. Here are a few common issues you can avoid with a little bit of knowledge.


Learn to not just understand their culture, but take part in it. As Americans, sometimes we work so hard that we forget to live life. Take some time to try to relax and enjoy the beautiful things this world has to offer.


Body Language

So you may have been told that the Filippo culture uses a lot of body language and this would be correct. You're probably wondering how this could lead to a fight or frustration. The first time I visited my now wife, she was laying on the couch and I asked her if she wanted to go out for dinner.... no response. So I looked over at her and saw her face was buried in her phone and I asked her again, "Baby you want to go out to dinner tonight?" still with no response. What I failed to realize was she was telling me yes by raising her eyebrows. In the Filipino culture it was not necessary for her to give me a verbal response or even to put her phone down and look at me. Even after I realized that she was communicating her response to me, my first reaction is to feel disrespected that she wasn't engaging more with me. It took some getting used to, but this is simply her culture and how she has been raised. It is not at all a sign of disrespect and it was not intended to be so. You just have to remember that there is a cultural difference, and with time, you will get used to it.


Time

In America we live in a very punctual society where everything is planned out to the hour. I grew up hearing, "If you're not ten minutes early, you're late". I think I have even started saying it myself. The Philippines is one of the top vacation destinations in the world. It is known for the beautiful beaches, insane waterfalls, and an overall laidback place to relax. This place is not laidback just in the tourist destinations. One of the reasons the Philippines is so amazing is the laid back culture of the islands. Along with that, comes a "relax, and we will see you when we get there" mentality.



Social Media

A lot of the women in the Philippines love western culture. However, all they have to go by on understanding western culture are movies and people they follow on social media. This can cause problems in your relationship. They look at a celebrity's Instagram or Facebook and see the likes, comments, and the outfits these people wear. The situation I hear most often is regarding Facebook. I don't think I have ever met a Filipina that did not accept every friend request she has ever received. This leads to a lot of inappropriate comments in 20 different languages. Don't worry. This will not be a permanent problem. Don't demand she delete her Facebook the first week you have met her. She is proud of the amount of followers she has and looks at it almost as a social status. Instead, I would express to her that you do not like the comments that some of the guys are leaving, and ask if she could delete the particular men who are commenting. As she becomes more comfortable in your relationship, she will probably delete most of the men she doesn't personally know, or she will just create a new account.


Jealousy

It is no secret that Filipinas can be very jealous. You have to understand this is from being raised in a community where there are a lot of women that will attempt to steal their boyfriends. There is no magic cure for this but as she realizes you are faithful it will eventually get better(or so I have heard).

Devil's Advocate

If you look at this from your girlfriend's point of view, she is going to think you are crazy, OCD about time, that you don't trust her, and that you need to relax. She might have a point. There is a reason you are happy being with a Filipina. Learn to not just understand there culture, but take part in it. As Americans, sometimes we work so hard that we forget to live life. Take some time to relax and enjoy the beautiful things this world has to offer.

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First and foremost, thanks for visiting our site!  My name is Daniel Miller and I have felt for quite a few years that I was ready to settle down and find someone to share my life with.  Then I ran across an issue.  There just weren't many women in the US that shared my values.  Eventually I started looking overseas and met the love of my life in the Philippines.

 

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