Some helpful hints on some common mistakes that Filipinas do to scare American men away.
The last few weeks I have been contacted by many women in the Philippines asking for help in finding an American husband. I am not a match making service but I do enjoy helping whenever I can. I started thinking of good tips other than the obvious, like getting on an international dating site. I have come up with a list of dos and don'ts according to what type of man you want to attract.
Little Bit About The American Man
So, just as it is in any culture, not all men are the same and we all have different motives. I am going to try to limit this to the most common type of man that would be looking for love in the Philippines. The traditional Christian men that are looking for someone with more traditional values like family, God, and life-time commitment, are men that are usually fed up with dating in the US. They may have already had a bad divorce or may be widowed. A partner who is honest and trust-worthy ranks very high with these men.
"Photos of yourself posing in a bikini is not going to attract the man that is looking to settle down and get married."
Putting yourself on display in a sexual manner will get you a lot of attention on dating sites as well as social media, but it's not going to be from the men you want to marry. A volume of men messaging you is not a sign of success. It's the quality of men that you meet. Photos of yourself posing in a bikini is not going to attract the man that is looking to settle down and get married. You have to remember that a lot of American women do this, and there is a reason he is looking in the Philippines and not in America. I'm not saying a bathing suit is not acceptable, but it's going to depend on the bathing suit, as well as the manner in which you are wearing it. A photo of you in modest swimwear with a group of friends would be acceptable, but a photo in a more revealing bikini in which its sole purpose is to display your body, will be a turn-off.
Your social media can be a relationship-killer before the relationship has even begun. Americans look at social media as a place to keep family up-to-date with what is going on in their current lives. It's NOT a place to meet strangers and build a fan club. After you meet on a dating site, it will probably progress to exchanging social media contacts. Here are a few things that will make him turn and run when he sees your page.
1. Your "fan club" will make a lot of men turn and run. If you know what I am talking about, I am more than likely talking to you. Having one hundred guys that comment how beautiful and sexy you are each time you post a photo is going to scare away a lot of men. They look at this as if you are a attention seeker. In The US an "attention seeker" is known as a woman that always needs attention from a man to feel self-worth. It is also common thing that if her boyfriend is not actively giving her attention, she will seek out to find it from other men.
2. "Bad Track Record" -- After observing a lot of profiles for a period of time, I have seen women that have "fallen in and out of love" too many times to count. One day they met someone and its all hearts and love, and one week later its a profile full of depression and tears. To most men this is a sign of immaturity. A person looking for love in a foreign county is ready to marry, not play games. Someone who appears to rush into a relationship, will also be looked as if they are immature and not ready for marriage.
3. "Rollercoaster of Emotions" -- Your emotions should be kept between you and the ones you trust, not on social media for the world to see. When your man tells his family he has entered into a relationship with a woman on the opposite side of the planet, they will be interested and rightly so. His family will probably go look at your Facebook page and can develop impressions of you before meeting you. Make sure it is the best impression that you can make.
Everyone has some friends of the opposite sex, and there is nothing wrong with that. However, you need to make sure that the relationships you have with any male friends are appropriate before you enter into a romantic relationship with a possible future spouse.
1. An American man who is looking for traditional values is going to expect you to not ever be alone with a man of the opposite sex, unless you are related to him. You can go out with a group of friends that are both male and female, but Americans look at one man and one woman going out together as equaling a date. It doesn't matter if they are both single or both married.
2. If a male friend has expressed anything to you that he likes you more then a friend, you need to terminate the relationship immediately. It is hard enough having a long-distance relationship, and this will simply put strain on the relationship until it breaks.
3. Don't have pictures on social media of you hanging all over a male friend of yours. It will give the wrong idea to any man thinking about engaging in a relationship.
All men are different, and I am in no way encouraging you to pretend to be something you're not. I am simply trying to give you a few things to think about, and to give you a little incite into the way American men think. This is primarily for those girls looking for a more traditional Christian guy. On the other side, you might like getting a little wild and going to have some fun at the night clubs. Just be yourself and there are men that will be attracted to the more modern life-style as well.
The bottom line is be yourself, but be considerate of the culture of the type of man you want as a husband. If you liked this article (or hated it), leave a comment below. If I missed anything, or you would like to see me write an article on a particular topic, then shoot me a message.